Got a funny that's clean or even an accidental funny. Let's all get a good laugh because it's healthy.
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Keep it clean (we have youngsters here) and leave the politics and religious jokes for some other forum
5 posts • Page 1 of 1
A young fella went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Kentucky.
They spent a great evening chatting the night away, and the next morning the grandfather prepared breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast. However, the grandson noticed a film like substance on his plate, and questioned his grandfather asking, 'Are these plates clean?'
His grandfather replied, 'They're as clean as cold water can get 'em. Just you go ahead and finish your meal, Sonny!'
For lunch the old man made hamburgers and again the young man was concerned about the plates, as his appeared to have tiny specks around the edge that looked like dried egg and asked, 'Are you sure these plates are clean?'
Without looking up the old man said, 'I told you before, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get them. Now don't you fret, I don't want to hear another word about it!'
Later that afternoon, the grandson was on his way to a nearby town and as he was leaving, his grandfather's dog started to growl, and wouldn't let him pass.
The boy yelled and said, 'Grandpa, your dog won't let me get to my car'.
Without diverting his attention from what he was doing the old man shouted!
'Coldwater, go lay down now, yah hear me!'
I don't believe in taking the bull by the horns. I took a goat by the horns once and that was enough excitement for me.
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Heard one similar years ago ----
Seems a couple was having uninvited guests show up just before dinner. The lady always managed to stretch the meal to feed the visitors. This went on for months. Finally frustrated, she waited till they showed up again and had another free meal but were still in the kitchen. All the used plates were put down on the floor and the dog licked them clean. She then took the plates and put them back in the cabinet. -- Result, no more just before dinner guests...
Dad used to tell the same one, except it was rag and 2 waters. Dog and 2 cats
"The Constitution is not an instrument for the government
to restrain the people, it is an instrument for the people to restrain the
government lest it come to dominate our lives and interests." Patrick Henry
5 posts • Page 1 of 1
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